This Regret Page 68

He lets out a chuckle and rubs his hands together. It was always a nervous habit of his. It used to drive me nuts. “You want the truth?” He looks down to meet my eyes and I look up nervously, unsure of the answer.

“The truth is always a good place to start.” Wish I had the nerve to tell Kellan that. “Is your mom sick again?”

He reaches out and grabs my hand, his thumb rubbing mine. “No, she’s fine. I missed you.” He swallows and places his other hand on top of mine and squeezes it. “Business didn’t go quite the way I planned and it made me realize I was stupid to leave in the first place. I loved you. Hell, I still do, Phoenix.”

“Umm . . .” I swallow and look over toward the bar again and notice Kellan beginning to stand up. He’s probably about to leave and I didn’t even get a chance to be close to him. I’m a fool for even caring. “I wasn’t expecting this, Aiden. I don’t know what to say.”

“I know I should have called first. There were so many times I wanted to call or text, but I didn’t know how to start.” He reaches out to run a finger over my lips and his touch is so gentle it tickles. “Let me take you out on a date. We can start over and-“

Before I can process what he is saying or even think of how I am going to respond, I feel a hand grip my waist and suddenly, I’m pressed into a stiff body. A rough hand cups around my cheek as a set of lips roughly take mine, sucking and nibbling. He tastes so good . . .

It doesn’t take me seeing his face or hearing his voice to know it’s him. It’s all there in the taste of his mouth and the way he makes my body tremble with one touch. His lips take mine, his body claiming me as he holds me closely against him. The feeling is so intoxicating I can’t even breathe.

Finally, our lips part and Kellan is standing above me, holding my face as he looks down into my eyes. “I’m going outside to make a call. I’m not going anywhere.” He looks beside us at a stunned Aiden and grips my waist tighter, running his lips up my neck. “I’ll be right back.” He gives him a warning look before kissing my lips again, but gently this time, tasting me and breathing heavily as if he’s just run a marathon.

When he’s done, he looks over at Kade who is angrily slamming down glasses, preparing some drinks for the girls in front of him. Kade keeps his eyes on Kellan as he walks out the door, looking as if he’s ready to smash his face in.

My mind is spinning or maybe it’s just the room. I can’t tell right now. What the hell just happened?

“So you have a boyfriend,” Aiden asks through tight lips. “It would have been nice if you told me in the first place and saved me from embarrassment.”

“No,” I breathe. “He’s not my boyfriend.” I could only wish. I reach up and touch my lips without thinking. “He’s an old friend. It’s complicated.”

Aiden reaches in his pocket and pulls out his keys. “I can tell. Well, once you get over this complication, my number's the same as before. Give me a call. I should get going.”

He turns to leave, but I reach out and grab his hand, stopping him. “Wait.” I look at him, wishing I could want him like he wants me, but I just don’t feel it anymore. I guess sometimes distance doesn't make the heart grow fonder. Sometimes the wives tales are wrong. All I can think about is Kellan. He occupies every spot in my brain, destroying me bit by bit, leaving no room for anyone else. “I’m sorry, Aiden. It was nice seeing you.”

His hand slips from mine and he walks away. Walks away as I stand there stunned, still touching my lips, while leaning against the table for support. Since when did things become so complicated?

I’m standing here alone, lost in thought when I hear someone trying to get my attention by the pool table.

“Yo, Phoenix. Wake up. We could use another round of beer over here.”

I shake my head and try to stand, but I get dizzy for a moment and have to catch myself. Looking around the bar, the faces start to blur and my breathing quickens. Damn anxiety! It always hits at the wrong times. I close my eyes and rub my hands over my face while taking long, deep breaths in an attempt to calm down and get a grip. “I’ll be right there,” I barely get out because my voice cracks. “Just give me a minute.”

I stand there for I don’t know how long, gripping the edge of the table and trying to clear my thoughts, before I finally feel somewhat normal. I release the table and walk over toward the pool table, but when I get there, all of the bottles are full. “You guys are good?” I ask James, one of the regulars.

He positions his pool stick and nods his head. “Yeah, are you okay? Maybe you need a break. You spend too much time here,” he says while squeezing my arm. “Why don’t you let that other dude up there fill in for you? He’s the one that brought us our drinks. There’s no reason to have three of you here right now.” He knocks a ball into the right pocket and looks up as I stand there staring like an idiot. “And where’s that band? Isn’t it band night?”

Ah, shit! He’s right. It is band night. I almost forgot. “Sorry about that,” I apologize. “I just needed a moment to myself. The band should be here soon.”

James smiles and elbows his friend in the side to get his attention. “Your turn, dumbass.” He takes a sip of his beer and smiles. “No worries, beautiful.” Then he sets it down and gets back to his game.

Kade is just hanging up the phone as I make my way up to the bar. He looks at me and grips his curls in his hand before leaning over the bar. “Well, looks like we’re shit out of luck for music tonight. The band obviously has van troubles. Those little shits better not be lying.”

Dale hates the bar going without a band on band night. He says it gives the bar a bad rep when we promise something we can’t deliver. Very true. I don’t blame him. His business is so successful because of that kind of thinking. “Well, what about Blindside? Can they fill in for the night?”

Kade looks up, his eyes settle behind me and he smiles. “Nah, they can’t, but maybe my big bro here can.” He smirks. “You know how to play guitar, right?” He laughs under his breath and tosses me a towel to help clean. “Maybe you can save the night. Be everyone’s f**king hero, for once.”

What is he doing? He knows Kellan can’t sing for crap. He always did, just messing around when we were younger, but even he admitted he sucked. He’s doing this on purpose to challenge Kellan. He knows Kellan will never say no to a challenge.

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